This is a short list of what scares me about being a parent (beyond the possibility that my kids get hurt or seriously hurt someone else).
- That they learn how to take off their diapers and begin smearing poop on the wall (I have heard some nasty stories y’all!)
- That my kids laugh whenever they hit me and I say “ouch!” really loudly. A small part of me things there is something very wrong with them. Yes, I do try to avoid giving them a reaction but sometimes you can’t control these things
- That my baby crawls over dog poop…or really that I ever have to come into contact with dog poop.
- That a spider crawls all over my kids and bites them in the night! That’s just nasty!
- That my kids will swim in water or plays in some dirt and will contract some parasite that eats their brain (I have hear some scary stories y’all!)
- That my kids reject all my values and grow up to hate me. On this point I feel like I have pretty realistic expectations.
I have a feeling I will add to this list in the future.