My daughter ate my favorite chapstick yesterday and my son pooped on my arm…it was so impressive I took a picture of it. That is all.
Does anybody else get annoyed by people saying/ doing judgy things. Oh my gosh! I just got super judged at my local community center! I was carrying the two tired kids out of the play area and I had to put my daughter down eventually (sorry, I am not a body builder). I tried to hold her hand instead and she started a full on tantrum. After a couple attempts to calm her down I told her I would wait for her by the front door when she was ready to go (which she could see and was about 50 feet away). She was quietly fussing and crying in the hall and I had many people give me dirty looks and even try to come up and tell me that my kid was crying…like I didn’t know. The lady seemed confused and surprised that I wasn’t going to immediately go over and coddle her and make her stop crying. After a few minutes I went over and asked if she was ready to hold my hand and go home and we walked out to the car no problem. It turned out positive but it felt pretty intense in the moment. One guy walking by even went to the front desk and said he was concerned about the little girl crying. It was super embarrassing and the receptionist gave me mean looks. I didn’t realize letting your kid work out their tantrum in public was such a horrible thing. Sorry, my kid was not abandoned, in danger, or scared. Only mad. Good thing I am confident in what is best for my child or I would be caved under the pressure and missed out on a good discipline/ teaching moment.
In another case, I was at a meeting and this older lady asked how I was and I said “pretty good. the kids are a little crazy but other then that it’s great!”. She just said “well, if you have two kids that close together then you should just expect that”. Now, I know I am a little sensitive right now but really? Really? How about saying “good job mom, all your hard work will pay off” or give some actual good advice on how to manage young kids well. Besides, I did expect it to be hard but that doesn’t mean you don’t have to walk through those challenging days. It’s not like knowing something will be hard magically makes it easy. I agree that a positive and realistic attitude goes a long way but some day are just hard. Just weeks are just hard. Some months are just hard. My kids are amazing, my life in amazing, but it’s not always easy. Everybody has their own pressure points and things that make them feel drained and strained. Listening to my son scream (he’s always been a fussy/ clingy baby) is really hard to handle and leaves me confused, and on the verge of tears. It doesn’t help that he NEVER acts out in public so I think my friends are starting to think that I am making it all up. It feels very isolating. And yes, for the record he does get out for an activity/ play date/ etc. at least once a day if not twice. People tell me all the time that their “fussy ” kid would be happy if they got out everyday. But my son just goes back to cranky the minute we get home.
Some other people like to tell me I am doing too much for him. One mom told me multiple times in one day that he is just fake crying and is getting away with it because he’s cute. Ok, saying that once is fine and I heard you and I am open to considering that but no. Just no. I know my kids and I know a real cry from a fake cry. Unless you want to give me some real advice to dealing with a clingy, sensitive, needy child, then shut up. My daughter never acted like this and I have the same parenting style for both kids so I know it’s not just me.
Don’t get me started on sleeping. My son is 14 months old and still wakes up screaming multiple times a night and takes up to 45 minutes of fussing to go to sleep at night (and yes, I have a regular routine and I don’t sleep with him or try to rock him to sleep). My daughter was never like that. I haven’t gone into his room at night since he was 10 months old unless it truly seems like something is wrong. One of my friends was complaining about how her 8 month old son didn’t sleep. Then she let him cry for 15 minutes once and now he goes to bed no problem and sleeps 11 hours straight at night. I really believe in being supportive to other moms but I had to step away from a conversation when she and another mom (which has the admittedly easiest baby anybody has ever known) were having about their “sleep troubles”. Please! I will show you sleep troubles.
Anyway, my kids are cute perfectly normal kids. But nobody says having young kids is hard just to be dramatic. It probably doesn’t help that my husband works full time, is in school full time, and my son refuses to play with him so I have baby time all the time.